There was a great applause in the auditorium today. I delivered my best sermon yet. The story of Shadrack, Meshack and Abednego; how the three Hebrew boys, as scholars call them, had just refused to bow down to a foreign god. They were so passionate and rigid on their faith that they said they would rather die than bow. I felt it – it was a powerful sermon and I know people were encouraged to only bow down to God. It felt great- people coming to me after church to congratulate me. This is it, a start of my ground-breaking calling as a preacher- a lady preacher.
My day started off great, I got the call I had always been waiting for, Youth Funding Organization’s call. God knows I have been praying for funding for my new business and it has been very difficult for me . Praying every day, declarations, believing and no sign of rain. But this morning I knew it, God had answered my prayer. I only sent the application 2 weeks ago, but I have already received a call to come see them tomorrow – YAY! Isn’t God just wonderful. Can’t wait for tomorrow.
I can’t believe this ☹. I am not sure if it is a good thing that I am even thinking about this. Sigh. So, the guy at YFO told me he can organize funding for me if I resubmit and ask for R500 000 extra on the initial R1 million rand and he will fast track it and ensure I have my funding end of the month. All I have to do is to give him the R 500 000 when I get the funds. If I refuse to do that he will make sure my application is declined. God, is that you giving me a breakthrough? I mean, it’s not like he is asking me to sleep with him or anything, I just have to show how I am going to use the R500 000 in case auditors check the paper trail but then it wont be mine. Arghhh… why??? I really need this break. Worst part of all is Thabang is on my case after I told her, telling me how this is exactly what Shadrack, Meshack and Abednego went through, just in modern day terms. Talk about throwing my sermon right back in my face hey. How is it the same though? They were bowing to an image, I’m not bowing down to any god, am I, God?
I woke up late today, I just slept in. As difficult as it was for my hopes and dreams, I had to decline the offer. My spirit just couldn’t allow me to. I now understand how the Hebrew boys felt. Forced to bow down to the norms and ways that are against what I believe in despite the consequences of not giving in. What happens if I never get funding though? Is it the same as when they said they would rather die? I think it is true when Jesus spoke of temptation that come because of the Word, I mean , to go through such after my ‘powerful’ sermon??